![]() Studies show that most people are not good listeners. When your mom sternly proclaims, “Listen to me, young man,” or when the coach hollers “Listen up“, our cues automatically tell us that something bad or bossy will immediately follow - spurring us to tune out. Given the fact that most of us spend far more time listening than talking (a few of my “gabby” friends being the exceptions), why haven’t more educational institutions placed a greater emphasis on cultivating strong listening skills? The author aptly notes that even from an early age, we are conditioned to tune out listening. ![]() Some colleges even require students to take public speaking courses. There are many college courses that focus on public speaking. I’ve been particularly attuned to works that focus on critical listening skills. Read moreĪs a part-time communications professor on several college campuses for the past 34 years, I devour books that deal with any form of communication. It’s time to stop talking and start listening. Equal parts cultural observation, scientific exploration, and rousing call to action that's full of practical advice, You're Not Listening is to listening what Susan Cain's Quiet was to introversion. She makes accessible the psychology, neuroscience, and sociology of listening while also introducing us to some of the best listeners out there (including a CIA agent, focus group moderator, bartender, radio producer, and top furniture salesman). In this always illuminating and often humorous deep dive, Murphy explains why we’re not listening, what it’s doing to us, and how we can reverse the trend. A listener by trade, New York Times contributor Kate Murphy wanted to know how we got here. And it’s making us lonelier, more isolated, and less tolerant than ever before. So do our politicians.ĭespite living in a world where technology allows constant digital communication and opportunities to connect, it seems no one is really listening or even knows how. On social media, we shape our personal narratives.Īt parties, we talk over one another. Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to SomeoneĪt work, we’re taught to lead the conversation. **Hand picked by Malcolm Gladwell, Adam Grant, Susan Cain, and Daniel Pink for Next Big Ideas Club** Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Originals and Give and Take There’s no one better qualified than a talented journalist to introduce you to the right mindset and skillset-and this book does it with science and humor." ![]() "If you’re like most people, you don’t listen as often or as well as you’d like. When was the last time you listened to someone, or someone really listened to you?
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